Umm, I don't believe you

Call is for a mid 30s male, seizure.

We arrive on scene to find our patient sitting at the table surrounded by evidence of quite the party. Patient is alone and showing signs of obvious ETOH (booze). Not another soul is there with any noticeable signs of life. I am tempted to go around  the house and check vitals.

Did anyone witness the seizure?

Yeah, me.

How long did it last?

About 5 minutes.

Can you describe it?

Yeah, it was real bad this time. I was shaking like this and my eyes rolled back and my lips turned blue.

Was it petite or a grand mal?

Huh?

Did you extend your arms or draw them in to your body.

Oh, for sure, yeah, both.

How long ago did it end?

Oh, about 15 minutes ago.

Are you sure?

Yeah, for sure, about two smokes.

Are you postictal?

No, I had a poo last night.

Do you know where you are?

Yeah, at a dead party.

Can you walk?

For sure, look.

OK, lets go.

I need an IV.

OK, lets go.

Is Sherrie working ? She's nice.

No I think she's off shift.

I feel better now.

OK, lets go.

No, I'm OK.

Do you know what day today is.

Hhhmmm, let's see, yesterday was pay day.......